Pious by Pius Johnson Chapter Two
by piousmfw
Summary: Max has lunch.


2. The Shoot.

About an hour later everything was set. Victor Matlock the director of photography, who was the second most important person on the set, clapped his hands and called out, "Okay People. Let's try to get this right and in one, yes?" He pointed to Bobby, "Bobby, show me the zapper." Bobby held up the electrical hair clippers. He revealed an electrical charge attached to the handle. This was powered by a trip wire that lead into a small trigger held by Victor and was plugged in across the room beside Clarence. "Okay perfect," said Victor. "Now I'm not gonna turn it up on full or anything Bobby."

"Why not?" said Bobby.

"Because I don't wanna hurt you," said Victor.

"Are you gay?" said Bobby.

"Yes, no. It's wrong to hurt people Bobby," said Victor.

"You're wrong," said Bobby.

"Bobby," barked Clarence stamping his foot angrily.

"Bobby, when you feel the little shock it's just a cue for you to yell and cry loudly. Got it? The louder, the better. Understand Bobby?" said Victor.

"Wa wa wa. Scream like a bitch, not stupid Vic. Anything else?" asked Bobby.

"No," said Victor, "Phone away Attila, pay attention. Melvin sound, rolling yes?" The soundman Melvin gave Vic the thumbs up. Victor turned to Max, "Max, we are ready." Max nodded. "Okay, standby everyone, and action. Go Clarence," said Victor.

Clarence smiled and pushed Muhammad behind the three friends who worked at the table on their electrical items. Max stared hard into his tablet. On it was a great shot of Bobby who held up the clippers near his face. Max gave Victor the nod, his cue to hit the zapper. Victor pressed the button. Bobby and the others worked away undisturbed. Max waited confused. Clarence pushed Muhammad behind the worktable jealously as the three actors were being filmed. Max frowned and pointed again to Victor who struggled with a faulty zapper trigger. Sally, Hugo and Bobby continued to assemble the hair clippers like total masters. Behind the action, Clarence upped his game and samba shuffled as he pushed Muhammad past the worktable yet again. Attila the big steadycam operator had a lovely close up of Bobby's face. Max could see it too on his tablet. Bobby stuck his tongue out while he focused hard on some detailed wiring work. Attila nodded to Max to zap him immediately while they had the shot.

Max whispered, "Go Vic, go, now, shock him." Vic pressed the button on the zapper but nothing happened to Bobby. Behind the action Clarence turned around and passed by again this time he hummed loudly while doing impressive high kicks. Muhammad smirked at Max in silence. Max could barely contain his rage.

He hissed, "…Where the fuck is the electric shock, Victor?"

"…Trying Max," said Victor as he fiddled with the trigger. Melvin the young, white, soundman decided the shot was finished. He lowered his boom. Pulled off his earphones and whipped off his bandana from around his head. He shook out his long blond dreadlocks and sighed in boredom. Attila beside him removed his eye from the viewfinder and glared at Melvin in disgust. He was stunned that Melvin had actually added grievous, hippy, black culture voluntarily to his head. Across the room Max ground his teeth as he watched Victor turned the dial on the zapper up and down. The scene was falling apart. Bobby suddenly punched the air and slammed down the finished hair clippers.

He yelled, "Beer me." Behind him Clarence tap-danced, lost in his own world, while he pushed Muhammad past. Suddenly the front wheel of the wheelchair hit a bump. The chair shuddered. Muhammad rocked forwards violently and nearly tipped out of the chair. Thankfully, he was strapped in tight and he rocked back into his chair and farted loudly. Clarence looked around the front of the chair to see what the problem was. Max, wildly enraged, leapt in before the cameras and snatched up the rigged electrical clippers off the table before Bobby. He held them up poised to throw at Victor when Clarence plugged in the loose lead into the socket. Max froze suddenly pumped full of heavy amps. He screamed through gritted teeth and shook violently. Attila filmed Max who suddenly blasted backwards up over the table. He slammed into the wall beside Muhammad. The whole room gasped with horrific concern as Max sat on his ass on the floor. His head slumped. Smoke wafted up from his head. His palms turned up. He looked dead. All the patients peered over the worktable in silence. Muhammad made a big happy chuckle. Clarence rushed up to Max.

He screamed, "Oh my God, oh my God, look away children." Attila zoomed in on Clarence who hugged Max's head hard into his crotch. Muhammad did not look away. He stared jealously at Max's face pressed hard into Clarence's swollen crotch. Muhammad blew a bubble. Max groaned and suddenly grabbed Clarence's butt with both hands. Clarence let out a high pitched girly scream. Max awoke. He tried desperately to pry himself away while Clarence screamed hysterically and pounded his wad into Max's face. Max strained hard and finally freed himself. He fell back against the wall dazed. The whole room hung frozen in silence. Clarence panted hotly and licked his lips looking down at Max. Max hauled himself up to his feet. He swayed like a drunken monkey and stared at the residents long and hard. He raised the guilty electrical clippers welded to his palm.

"What the actual fuck? Are you seriously trying to kill me now? Is that it? Vic? You wanna direct this, is that it?" screamed Max. Victor rushed over and comforted him.

"I'm so sorry Max. We'll get it right on this take. I promise. It was an accident. We're nearly done. Are you hurt? No? C'mon stay strong bro, we need you now," said Victor. Max gripped the burnt clippers with his other hand. He winced in agony as he slowly peeled them away from his palm along with a thick layer of skin. He held up his red raw hand to the entire household and revealed the clipper logo burned into his palm. "I'm Arnold Toht from Raiders of the Lost Ark," he screamed outraged. Everyone cringed in fear as to what awaited them from Clarence later. Muhammad continued to eye Max hatefully. Across the room Attila, the giant brooding, steadycam operator answered his phone, "What? No. You are not renting my room. Whadayamean? For what, a cleaner? Then for who? …A new squeeze? Mom, you promised you'd never- Yeah well if Dad was alive… Hello, yo, mom? Mom?" he shouted. He paused and turned to Melvin who magically produced a Chumpa-chump from nowhere and handed it to him. Attila smacked it out of his hand.

Victor clapped and called out, "Take two. Attila, Melvin, c'mon we're going again, reset," Victor turned and called out to the whole room, "let's go everyone. C'mon Max. Everyone, get back in your original places. Bobby I have another set of clippers here for you. Max? Max?" said Victor. But Max just glared hatefully at Clarence.

Clarence confessed sheepishly, "I am so sorry Max. Muhammad must have knocked the plug out with his drag foot." He stepped up to Max and lightly dabbed his brow. "But hey, you and I can always plug-in together later right, get a bit of down time?" Max stared deadpan at him. Muhammad twitched and blew another bubble. Max shuddered, turned his back and approached the table. He glared hatefully down at Bobby while Hugo and Sally giggled gleefully.

"How are you people happy, how?" asked Max.

Vic rushed up to him and said, "Max, relax, we're set to go again, we'll get it this time. I promise." Suddenly a large lump of brownie fudge landed on Max's face. Max froze with the brown lump stuck to his cheek. The whole room paused. Max slowly scraped it off. He looked around at the room for the guilty suspect. All stared at him in silence.

Max chuckled, "…Ha, ha, ha. Is this some kind of prank? Huh? How did you people know it was my cake day?" said Max. The residents stare in wonder as Max popped the piece of brownie into his mouth and chewed. "…Well, I'm sure that this cake is very nice," he said, "but sadly I got this cold and I can't really taste it. Oh yes, wait, nuts, nice, mmm." He paused and fished around in his mouth, "Wait, what's that, corn, okay that's odd. But thank you everyone, that's very kind of you to bother." The entire room silently watched Max ceremonially hold up the final large piece of brownie and push it into his mouth. Max smiled with chocolate fudge wedged between his teeth. Victor sidled up next to Max as he chewed and swallowed the last piece.

"…Max, we didn't get you a cake," said Victor. Max chewed the remaining chunks in his mouth and looked out at the hundred or so residents who all stared back at him in deadpan silence.

"…No cake?" said Max.

"Oh Muhammad, no. Bad boy," scolded Clarence. Max and Victor turned to Muhammad as he laughed with his hands flapping in his colostomy bag.

Muhammad made, "nom nom," sounds and laughed loudly staring at Max. Sally sat right beside Max she tapped his side, Max looked down at her.

"He gets very protective over Clarence," she said. Max suddenly vomited a half a gallon of spew all over her face. Sally just held that position entirely caked in vomit. Max turned, groaned loudly and then staggered out of the dayroom.

Clarence gnashed his teeth in rage. He looked around at all the dozens of silent, scared faces. "You selfish little freaks. You had to spoil my big break, didn't you?" He dug his nails viciously down into Muhammad's neck and snarled into his ear. "And as for you, you poisonous little snake, we are finished do you hear?"

"Clarence? What are you doing to poor Muhammad?" said a kind voice. Clarence span to face the Governor of the care home. He was a truly kind and patient old man who'd returned for his annual inspection. Clarence was so swept away with the film crew and the opportunities he imagined it presented that he entirely forgot about their appointment. The Governor stood in the centre of the room and looked around deeply baffled. "What on earth is going on in here? Who are these people, Clarence?" he gestured to Victor, Attila and Melvin who quickly packed up their gear. Clarence put on his deepest, sternest voice and gestured to the film crew.

"Ah hello sir. Yes. Um, these people are the film crew. They're here to shoot our internet safety commercials for our website, sir."

"…But Clarence, we don't have a website," said the Governor. Clarence hesitated and nodded, unsure of what to say. He turned to lay the blame on Victor who hurriedly crossed the room with a camera on his shoulder and cables under his arm out the door after Max. The befuddled Governor turned to Melvin and Attila who quickly followed Victor out.

**Hey can you please send me the answers to below:**

**What would you give this chapter out of ten?**

**What would make it a 10/10 for you?**

**If you have found any typos or have any suggestions please send them to me, I really need your help.**


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